Oh, Goody: Waiting and Patience

Wait...that was sarcasm.  Contrary to the hero I play on TV, my real self stinks at waiting and patience. If I'm honest, I think it stinketh that one (waiting) begets the other (patience).  And, since I'm on a real roll with being honest, I'll also tell you that even though I know that waiting on God and patience are truly fruit of the Spirit, it takes everything I have to stop, drop, and roll pray my way out of doing God's job for Him.

This is my oblique way of saying to my 8 readers that something's been on my mind, and I haven't posted recently because I've let it consume me. I'm not ready to share it yet (sorry), so I thought I'd just attempt to get over myself and live life while waiting, truly waiting--palms up, heart open--to however God leads.  And often, my mind will tell me that I'm fine with this course of action--the RIGHT action.  It's just...my heart seems to be on a bit of a delayed cycle with the whole, "I trust you no matter what, God." process.

Have you ever felt consumed by a thought/worry/dream/question that you wanted God to answer?  And don't you feel even a little more "entitled" to Him for a quick answer if you're pretty certain that He's the one who laid it on your heart, anyway?  Just me?

But here's what I'm learning...or RE-learning, rather:

• God's plan is perfect. 
• Unlike me, who tends to perseverate (one of my favorite words from speech therapy days--except when it's about me), ruminate, and cogitate over things, God is omniscent and omnipotent.  His thinking is BIG.  Mine is little.  The Creator of the universe can truly see beyond the next few moments, years, millenia of my life.  It's covered.
• There's a lot to do in my life which is very distracting when i'm trying to worry/obsess over something. Laundry and cooking just won't wait forever. ;)
• There's a God who loves me and wants to bless me in this waiting if I'll only allow it.
• Blessings like:
• Laughter and silliness with a pre-teen daughter who still shares e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g. with me.  May she always do so.
• Seeing the triumph and joy in my son's face as he brings home three certificates of excellence in his classes.  School has not always been easy, not always been safe, not always been good.  It's good now.
• Talking to my dad on the phone and sharing a laugh--hearing that he's really in a good place right now.  Happy, even.
• Reading a great book. 
• Watching my husband leap out of our minivan to save an oblivious, but determined mama duck as she led her 8 ducklings across a busy road.
• Peace.

Abba, forgive me for my little thinking, my impatience, and my lack of trust:  my little faith.  I'm sorry for ever doubting Your perfect will and plan for my life.  Please help me to re-adjust my sails as I turn this boat around to follow You.  In Jesus' name.  Amen.

Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him, "You of little faith," he said, "why did you doubt?" Matthew 14:31

"Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth." Psalm 46:10

Dive

I'm pretty sure 90% of my readers either have heard of or have an abiding lurve for Stephen Curtis Chapman--hereafter, noted as SCC. :) One of his many amazing songs, Dive, has been so overplayed by me, my radio station, and a few years ago, our worship pastor. I'll link the lyrics, here, if you don't know it. Thing is, i don't think it would've received the play time were it not somewhat deserved, either by some snappy chorus (done), or inspirational, relatable lyrics (done). Lately, we've all chanced to see how he has lived his faith in the face of perhaps the worst nightmare ever: one of his children dying (accidentally) at the hand of another.

I want that.


Obviously, I don't want what happened to him to happen to me. I want the faith he has. I want to be so dependent upon Jesus that I need Him for every breath, every decision, and every action. Because the truth is, I DO need Him for all of those things. And I cannot believe that I'm saying this, but if having a faith similar to SCC's (he is well known and therefore relatable, but so many others have this type of faith, as well), and living this faith brings me misery of my own sort--no matter what it is--I have to want that, too. Not in my every day "I want a new outfit" kind of way, but in the "Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will but yours be done." (Luke 22:42, NIV) vein of longing. I want to have the faith that can be so battered and worn. So threadbare, that my Savior knows I'm at the end of my rope and loves me through it anyway. I want rich, inexplicable, amazing faith.


Getting to the point...(smile)...I'd like to encourage you to take a "dive" with me and go deep in your faith this year. It's always more fun to grow together. Maybe you're like me--a "maturing" Christian who has better intentions than follow through. Maybe you don't really have a belief system, per se. Or maybe you'd like to have a belief system, and are seeking your purpose under heaven. I invite you to come with me and meet my Jesus. I was raised as an only child, so I don't like to share much. But I'll share Jesus. He can be your Jesus, too. And I know He wants that.

Here are 2 opportunities I'm participating in, and invite you to join:






If you click on the pictures, you should be led to a synopsis of each "challenge". The first is a Bible reading challenge. I have been through most pages of the Bible at least once, and several parts many, many times. But this challenge (based on John Piper's doable program) encourages us to read the Bible each day, finishing within one year. The bonus? Grace days. I'm sure none of you has ever wanted to just have a day off, but I do. And there are 5 days off each month for you to schedule around. Though, there are no penalties for reading EVERY day, mind you. Thank you, Tanya, for spearheading this.

The second picture depicts a Bible study Safari on the book of Daniel. My amazingly talented teaching friend, Amber, has written this 12 week study, and it begins next week.

"But we will never know the awesome power

Of the grace of God

Until we let ourselves get swept away

Into this holy flood

So if you'll take my hand

We'll close our eyes and count to three,

And take the leap of faith

Come on, lets go..."

(Dive, by Steven Curtis Chapman)